Get The Right Things Done in 2017

To jump to module discussion, click here.

To view Module 1, click here.

To view Module 2, click here.

Module 3: What is your MOMENT about? (3 Parts)

Part 1: Do the Hardest Thing First (4:23)

Module 3, Part 1 Recommending Reading

Your Problem Isn’t Motivation

To jump to module discussion, click here.

Part 2: Take a Risk (6:20)

Module 3, Part 2 Recommending Reading

The Small Personal Risks That Actually Change Behavior

To jump to module discussion, click here.

Part 3: Stages of Learning (10:11)

Module Discussion

19 comments

add yours
  • Bryan Stoudt January 26, 2017 Reply

    Asking people to underwrite our ministry banquet. I definitely notice the resistance, probably because I don’t want to hear any ‘no’s. But I’ve started today, and will follow through first chance tomorrow!

  • Eva G. January 28, 2017 Reply

    Looking into a mirror while practicing singing. The reason my voice teacher advised this to me is that I have a direct feedback how the sound is influenced by mouth opening (broad or narrow), tension of the lips etc. I notice resistance because I am afraid that I do not like my face enough and the view of it will make me stop practicing. I have decided to practice looking at my own face and just register the feelings of resistance. It is similar to what happens when one hears a recording of one’s own voice – that is alienating because it sounds different from what you hear while singing. (It helps to give myself a smile from time to time.)

    • Ryan Cadigan January 29, 2017 Reply

      Eva, just saw your replies to my comments on message board #2. Thank you for your support! I replied to you there. I hope you find many smiles as you continue your singing practice 😉

      • Eva G. February 10, 2017 Reply

        During the past week I have practiced anchoring my new ‘tiny habit’ to give myself an encouraging and friendly smile when I need a bathroom or pass some mirror. This has helped – it feels more natural and ok now to look at myself, also when practicing singing. And I have also observed that I give others a kind smile more often- and often they smile back, which feels good and energizing.

  • Ryan Cadigan January 29, 2017 Reply

    My “hardest task” was planning for an upcoming conference call with a research team I have yet to meet, and presenting them a project proposal. I thought it through and realized that the reason I was procrastinating on it was because it was going to require me to sift through several different disorganized sources of information – my notes, emails and old files – which felt daunting and uncomfortable to me. I’ve realized that this is probably more true than not for me, using systems of organization is one of my weaknesses and because I have a backlog of poorly organized data/notes, I struggle to correct it going forward.

    • Ryan Cadigan January 29, 2017 Reply

      And also, unfortunately, some of that information is stored solely within my own personal memory banks, so I’m going to have to really wrack my brain to put this thing together, and that feels intimidating

  • Eva G. January 29, 2017 Reply

    Hi Ryan,
    (I did find some smiles today, thanks 🙂 – I’m getting used to this and am less disturbed. In fact, I found out many interesting things that help me find my sound. )

    Relating to brain-wrecking, I have found some helpful image some years ago, because I often find myself in the situation you describe – I have to sift through my own knowledge as well as other sources of information and like you, I often find it intimidating, too.
    For me, it feels like tangled wool, and if you just pull on one of the ends, you can be sure to pull the loops and knots tight which are hidden inside this chaos, and soon there will be knots you can’t loosen up any more. You have to be patient, take your time to follow the threads of thought where they lead and take care to loosen any knot and loop that you encounter.
    One friend to whom I mentioned these thoughts in such a situation, sent me a link to a picture of the virgin Mary, it is in a church in Augsburg, in South Germany. It is called “Maria Knotenlöserin”, which means “Mary, Untier of knots”
    (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Untier_of_Knots ).
    For me, it became a symbol for the patience it takes to untie the proverbial “knots in my mind”.

    To put that into practice, I sit down and create an email draft to myself. That may sound strange, but I found it helps, because it allows and encourages draft thoughts and I can go from there. It is as if I am both the counsellor and the one seeking advice at the same time. I am my own counterpart having an internal dialogue.
    Or you can imagine some colleague or client coming to you with this problem and try to think of what you would advise him or her. Then that is your counterpart.

    I start writing down a first question, or problem, I know
    my counterpart would ask me, and try to answer in writing. Often I discover that I know much more that I thought – to use your picture, I’m accessing my personal memory banks and follow the leads that I find, or at least if I feel I have to research in this direction more thoroughly, and I make a note for later…
    The hardest part is the beginning – then you may find that it is a very satisfying and creative process.

    • Julie February 15, 2017 Reply

      Hi Eva, I like your response to Ryan. I feel like I’m in a similar situation. The task that I feel most resistant towards involves sifting through information which accesses a lot of unpleasant memories for me which are difficult to process and which I feel distracts me from achieving my goal. I also really care about the outcome of what i’m working towards which makes it feel more overwhelming. To help with this I’m excited to try the email draft to myself that you mentioned. Thanks!

      • Eva G. February 16, 2017 Reply

        Hi Julie, thanks and I hope the email draft id helps. Let me know how it went when you’ve tried it.

  • Petar Serafimov January 30, 2017 Reply

    thinking and behaving as a leader without holding back…it is a challenge…

  • Janet February 2, 2017 Reply

    Took me three days but I finally did it and got started on my hardest thing!

  • Eva G. February 10, 2017 Reply

    I have started practicing to take a closer look at WHY something seems the hardest thing right now – asking myself “why” questions and other “w” questions about it like a child, until I get satisfying answers. There is always this initial resistance to invest thoughts and focus on the problem- once I’ve “put my problem-solving shoes on”, I find that I’m ready to go, and even begin to enjoy this process.

  • Trevor Manning February 12, 2017 Reply

    I love the idea that DOING demands us to stop THINKING about doing!! Great insight.

  • Trevor Manning February 12, 2017 Reply

    Module 3, Part I – I love the idea that DOING demands us to stop THINKING about doing!! Great insight.

    • Julie February 15, 2017 Reply

      I agree – I found it insightful too. The energy that was invested in the thinking was suddenly free to use for the doing. I felt not so stuck and not so drained afterwards.

  • Ellen February 13, 2017 Reply

    Trevor – agree about the RELIEF that doing quiets the negative voices!
    Ryan – I have a research project I need to dive back into that has been dormant for months and need to summarize to publish and present. I hesitate too to dive into all the old notes and history of previous work, much of which led to dead ends. So I let the more pressing deadlines … press this out further.
    So I’m scheduling time to organize this to create a path.

  • Ellen February 15, 2017 Reply

    Stuck my toes in the cold water of resurrecting the research whitepaper I need to finish.

    Letting deadlines on my “real work” push it aside again today. Then no excuses – I had my 30 minute window to dust it off, see where I stopped, and get it together. Heard the voices saying “this is no good”, “can’t be done, too big a question to tackle, you never should have agreed to do this stupid project” . Felt – FEAR, DREAD, FEAR, ANGER, FEAR. But the tactical organizing files, tracking down another reference, looking at the outline again – within 5 minutes I was on my way. Still scared, angry at myself for agreeing to do this, wishing it would go away and be over … risk of being humiliated amongst my external research community for putting my name on this, blah blah blah.

    I’m used to letting deadlines and panic push me through these fear blocks — but don’t want to live that way anymore. Been very successful this year with other scary writing tasks that I break down into small chunks- but this one has more ego in it beyond my work world – so I’m feeling it a lot more.

  • Julie February 15, 2017 Reply

    Module 3 Part 2: Take a Risk

    There are a couple of risks that I’d like to take that I believe can help me to move forward with some of my areas of focus.

    Feeling frozen and struggling with trusting others and myself to make the right decisions therefore I’m committing to taking a risk which for me means choosing and trusting a lawyer to represent me. This will help me with my following area of focus:
    3. Approach legal issues with the mindset that my goal is to reconnect with my daughter & build a healthy relationship.

    Taking the risk to say what I feel will help me with the following areas of focus:
    2. Expand, grow & find my pleasure.

    I also want to say to take the risk of dreaming of allowing myself to want things. And not letting the fear of potentially not having these things stop me. This will help me with the following area of focus:
    3. Approach legal issues with the mindset that my goal is to reconnect with my daughter & build a healthy relationship.
    1. Support my daughter in expanding, growing & finding her pleasure.
    4. Establish healthy relationships.
    5. Establish finances by doing work that is pleasurable & meaningful.

  • Julie February 15, 2017 Reply

    Thank you so much Peter! This was very helpful.

Leave a Comment

Answer this question (Captcha) *

Post